Vishal said: “you can thrive in married life only if you have a good sense of humour. Otherwise you will slit each other’s throats; there is only one person whose face you keep staring at daily.”
I thought that was a great realization from a man who is married for last twenty years and who’s known his wife even before that. Basically after two decades of married life he’s realized he needs a good sense of humour.
It was Socrates who told his curious Portege, “marry you must for if you get a good wife, you’d be happy; if not, you’d be a philosopher.”
The two principles that help married couples pull along happily are acceptance and appreciation.
A sense of humour essentially means the ability to accept life and oneself. Our past choices haunt us for long. But if we can learn to forgive ourselves, it would be easy to forgive our partner as well. Except in cases of extreme abuse and violence in a relationship, most marriages face the strain resulting from petty daily skirmishes, all due to our inability to accept ourselves. If we learn to be gentle on ourselves, and abandon our fetish for perfection in a world that is inherently filled with imperfect beings, we’d be more peaceful.
Seeing the good in one’s partner, and consciously appreciating his or her struggles, also helps married partners find happiness in their relationship.