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Three values of a Parent – Part 2

Many parents make the mistake of spending more time correcting their children than loving them for who they are. When I say this, parents protest that love is abstract, and what could they possibly do to show love. You could simply help them grow and marvel at this world; help them see the world for what it is, answer their questions, and give them the resources that would help them blossom. Your child is not an inconvenience that you are managing, rather you are raising a human being- the most evolved of all species on this planet!

As a parent, watch them do things on their own, and let them educate themselves, while you stand watchfully on the side. Always remember that to be in your children’s memories tomorrow, you have to be in their lives today. At the same time, you need to be detached, so that they figure out things and learn and grow. Like the caterpillar that needs to struggle to get out of the cocoon to fly as a butterfly, your child too needs to learn her lessons well. As the American philosopher Elbert Hubbard said, “Where parents do much for their children, the children will not do much for themselves.”

3.     Happy experiences

Taking the child out for an ice cream, playing with her in the rains, or an adventure in the National forest together helps the child rejoice life. She’d likely remember these events till the last days of her life. Even if she forgets the incidents, the experiences add to the emotional growth of the child.

Sometimes children are trained to be mature and speak and behave like adults. Don’t be surprised if these children during their thirties become depressed. You have snatched their childhood from them. Give them daily hugs, and encourage them to be expressive. Don’t fear their childishness. At the right time, things would fall in place. Children deprived of hugs feel more insecure and threatened than those who get their quota of cuddles and care. I once read an insightful quote that said, “Always kiss your children goodnight, even if they’re already asleep.”

With these three doable actions from your side, you have added to the emotional kitty of your child. Later as life would surely treat your child harshly- she after all is no exception to this law-she’d be better prepared to face them with grace and maturity.

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